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Saturday, July 18, 2009

So We Meet Again, Mr. Postmaster General

As many of you may recall, back when I was pregnant, I MAY have blamed the US Post Office for causing me to drop my entire bag of McDonald's French Fries (aka HOT SALTY DELICIOUSNESS) which then led to a series of unfortunate events (of which I also blamed the post office) ending in one final event of a frog in my mailbox (to which I replied "Touche Mr. Postmaster General, Touche!")


Well, it seems that the US Post Office may be on the prowl again! I received a nice card of correspondence from some dear church members that live up north and was delighted to see this nice envelope from them. However when I turned it over to open the envelope... what did I see?

(please note, dead frog above is just a depiction- I did not take any photos,
nor did I draw a chalk outline around the actual frog on the envelope)

Now, just so we're clear on this, I am not talking about a petrified, been dead for billions of years frog, I am talking, the postal worker must have used MY letter to smash this disgusting creature so hard that it was EMBEDDED on the envelope.

Go ahead, laugh all you want Mr. Postmaster General! Maybe I WILL plant the bee/wasp attracting flowers around my mailbox after all! I will train those stinging creatures to attack anytime that little white box truck pulls up in front of the mail box! You'll see Mr. Postmaster General.... YOU'RE MESSING WITH THE WRONG PERSON!!!!! [insert evil laugh]

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oooooooo, that Post Master General has struck again. But I am slightly afraid that you will not be able to train your attack bees to only attack the PMG, so may I offer another equally unpleasant solution...

Sam's club has an industrial size bottle of syrup, I say you buy it and apply it to the handle of the mailbox each morning so it will be nice and sticky for the PMG! Take THAT Mr. Post Master General!

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Kelly Spezzano said...

While you bring up a very valid point, I must point out two tiny flaws in your solution... #1 we don't have a handle on our mailbox (if you remember our mailbox was vandalized a while back and the lid was RIPPED off) #2 ANTS!!!!! lol

Bekah said...

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. Smashed frogs make for very icky envelopes.

Anonymous said...

I will pay for a new mailbox, with a handle and I will buy you gloves for the ants! Or better yet, just let Jim get the mail from now on!

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Brittany said...

I'm glad I don't have your Postman!

His Mercy Endureth Forever said...

I can't wait to see how this saga unfolds...

Owl of the Desert said...

Craziness. Your plight is most unusual. I would leave the envelope for the PM with a sticky that says, "Any ideas?"

Or better yet, maybe you should make lots of cookies and cakes for your PM...try to get him on your good side!

Kelly Spezzano said...

Interesting... Be nice to the PM???? Do you really think that would work? lol

Amy Ellen said...

Ewwwww poor frog. I like the syrup idea, but the ants....well.

Good Luck
Hugs
Amy